He was one of the strangest cab drivers I have encountered. He was in his 50s but thought of himself as a 20-something year old latino lover. He sported a hat and injected words like “mamasita” in the middle of every other sentence. Here’s the conversation that ensued:
Delusional Desi Driver: You beautiful lady
DDD: You should put on make-up in the morning…. Maybe pink lipstick to go with your shirt
Me (slightly amused): I am beautiful with or without make-up… how come you are an expert on make-up anyway?
DDD: I was married to American lady once. I get divorce since she want me to move to the country with her but we are still friends. She teach me about respect and hygiene. A lot of Indian lady and Pakistani lady don’t wear deodorant. You come to
Me (not amused any longer): You trusted her to sell your land. She has to be good.
DDD: You married?
Me (definitely not amused): I don’t feel comfortable disclosing personal information
DDD: You should introduce me to Bangladeshi girl… maybe 25-30 year old……
Me (pissed off): If a 25 year old married you it would probably be for your money
(At this point I had arrived at my work)
DDD: Are you going to have coffee before you go to work? Maybe I can buy you coffee.
Me: No thanks (as I slam the door shut and march off angrily)
It wasn’t till I got on the elevator that I realized I had forgotten to pay the fare……