Made in China

These days EVERYTHING is made in China - Murano glass, Ghanian fabric, Indian shawls..... Nothing is off limits. From American flags to statues of Hindu gods, it's all being manufactured in China.

Panda Lady

Talk about being pampered!

Steer Clear

My allergies are back with a vengence. I miss the good old days when everytime I sneezed my co-worker would sneeze back in response from the other side of the cubicle. Now that she has left, the drugs trade has come to a halt and I am stuck with only one variety of allergy medicine.

Apparently we use so much force when we sneeze that if we did not close our eyes they would pop out of their sockets. With each sneeze we release thousands of drool droplets containing bacteria into the air. So if you see me coming - DUCK!

The Best Way to Cope with Stress.....

is to get a drastic haircut.

Pluto is no longer a planet
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/5282440.stm

Soon it will disappear from the textbooks and we'll go about our lives acting like it never existed.

Explosive Combination

I stopped listening to "real" news many months ago. For a while I resorted to the Daily Show to get the headlines. These days I just count on cab drivers to fill me in on the latest word on the streets. This evening my informant told me that Osama has the hots for none other than Whitney Houston! Who knew there was an ardent lover behind this cold and unfeeling terrorist. Now the CIA can call off their manhunt and have Whitney scream out his name from the mountain tops of Tora Bora. The world would be a much better place if Osama devoted his time and energy to making Whitney "feel like a natural woman". Whitney in turn will always love Osama if he can supply her with freshly produced heroin.

Once Upon a Time on a Greyhound Bus

I had no choice but to sit beside a pothead (that was the last empty seat). He was in a very chatty mood although he could barely sit up straight. As a gesture of friendship he asked me whether I wanted gum and I politely declined. Before I knew it he was taking out the gum he had been chewing from his mouth and handing it to me. When he sensed my distaste, he got upset and grumbled about how standoffish and unsociable I was till he lulled himself to sleep.

Food for Thought

There are more obese folks (1 billion) in the world today than undernourished people (800 million)!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4793455.stm

Fat acceptance movements are springing up within the US to protect the rights of overweight people and change societal attitude towards obesity. They see themselves as an extention of the civil rights movement and are spreading their message through magazines, fat performance arts and conferences. However, many of these groups choose to deny that obesity is a growing health hazard:

National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance
http://www.naafa.org

The International Size Acceptance Association

http://www.size-acceptance.org/

A group called Fat Underground has even drawn up a Fat Liberation Manifesto, which ironically ends with the words:
Fat people of the world unite! You have nothing to lose
http://www.largesse.net/Archives/FU/manifesto.html

On Common Sense



Horace Greeley: Common sense is very uncommon

Albert Einstein: Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

Anon: Common sense is what tells us the Earth is flat and the Sun goes around it.

Douglas Adams: The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79.

Victor Hugo: Common sense is in spite of, not as the result of education.

Yours Faithfully

So I was having a chat with my friend about the boundaries in a relationship and what constitutes cheating. Then I recalled this story a cab driver had once told us. He was showing off the new GPS unit in his car and telling us how it comes with 3 voice options - a male voice, a mechanical female voice and thirdly a sexy woman's tone. Obviously he preferred the last one but his wife objected to it. She did not want some raspy-voiced chick (even if it's only a device) telling her hubby where to go while she was sitting at home guarding his nest.

Global Village

The world has over 6 and half billion people today. I am reading a fascinating children's book, which tries to promote a "one world" view. It starts off with the question - if the world were a village of one hundred people what would it look like? More than half the people in that global village would come from the 10 most populated countries in the world.

21 from China
17 from India
5 from the US
4 from Indonesia
3 from Brazil
3 from Pakistan
2 each from Bangladesh, Russia, Japan and Nigeria

This book has temporarily put me in a "lets-all-hold-hands-and-sing-kumbaya" mood. So these days I am trying to be a little more friendly and smiling till my lips reach their elastic limit. Very soon this spell will wear off and I will return to being angry, disgruntled and jaded ME.

Here's the link to "If the World Were a Village" by David J Smith, if you want to check it out
http://product.half.ebay.com/If-the-World-Were-a-Village_W0QQprZ2214136QQtgZinfo

In the Lime Light

Today's public speaking training has made me quite self-conscious. The instructor recommended that speakers are allowed no more than 3 distractions in their head, neck and shoulder area. Apparently my dangley earrings took up two of those points. She did try to make up for it by complimenting me on my "naturally happy disposition". I had chocolate before I walked into the room. So go figure.

Tomorrow she has threatened to video tape us while we speak on a topic of our choice. To top it off, our co-workers will sit around the table and take pot shots at us while we present.

One interesting fact I learnt is that if you lock your knees, it cuts off circulation and causes you to keel over. People in the military (esp beginners) often buckle their knees while trying to maintain their posture and this leads to fainting spells.

Deadly Cocktail

The Center for Science and Environment in New Delhi recently found that the pesticide levels in Pepsi and Coke drinks were more than 36 times higher than the limit set by the European Economic Commission! In some instances, Indian farmers have actually started spraying Coca Cola on their crops instead of paying high prices for patented fertilizers. Other uses of Coke include cleaning toilet bowls and removing rust.

Before 1906, the popular soft drink contained traces of cocaine. It was initially sold as a patent medicine, which was used to cure a variety of ailments starting from headaches to impotence.

Significant Bother

As I hurtle towards the wrong side of thirty, my parents (and the whole extended clan) are making a last ditch effort to help me tie the knot ("noose" might be a more appropriate word). Given that I am no longer 18 and don't rank among the "fair and lovely", here's what I am likely to spend the rest of my life with:

What Do Coffee, Ginger and Green M&Ms Have in Common?


They are all aphrodisiacs! Since sex sells, the candy company Mars Inc decided to cash in on the tantilizing urban legend to boost sales of M&Ms. The ad campaigns featured teasers like "What is it about the Green Ones?" or "She Melts for No One". Since the green M&Ms character is essentially trying to seduce kids, does it make her a paedophile?

http://www.usatoday.com/usatonline/20010914/3632950s.htm